


New Afterlife: Queer Eye for the Dead Guy

by wombatpop



Category: Queer Eye for the Straight Guy RPF, What We Do in the Shadows (2014)
Genre: Blood, Complete, Cooking, Friends to Lovers, Graveyard visiting, Grief/Mourning, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Makeover, Unholy Masquarade, queer eye AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-17
Updated: 2019-03-22
Packaged: 2019-08-04 19:42:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 4,883
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16353008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wombatpop/pseuds/wombatpop
Summary: A centuries-old New Zealand vampire reboots his life - and gets over his long lost love - just in time to hit the ultimate supernatural party.





	1. Introduction

An image of a dimly lit bedroom emerges from a black screen. Its wooden walls are unpainted, and the room is bare save a plain wooden coffin to one side of the room. Beside the coffin, an alarm clock perched on top of a crate beeps, announcing 6pm. At its call the coffin lid creaks open and a figure emerges, floating into a vertical position. He smiles awkwardly at the camera, stepping out of the coffin and presenting himself stiffly to the camera as a voiceover begins.

“Hi, my name is Viago, and I am a vampire.”

The shot shifts to reveal a wide foyer with a staircase leading up to the second floor. The décor is dusty and decaying, from another time, the walls a faded green. Viago walks through the foyer and up the stairs, knocking on a cupboard door.

“I live in Wellington with my friends, Deacon, Vladislav, Nick, and Petyr.”

As each housemate is announced, a shot of them being woken up by Viago is shown; Deacon grumpy, Vladislav stoic, Nick smiling and waving to the camera, and Petyr still asleep. The voiceover switches to Nick, overlaying various shots of Viago smiling, laughing, walking, standing.

“I think Viago needs a bit of help, you know, living his best life. He’s been doing the same things for centuries so I think a bit of twenty first century living would be good for him.”

The camera switches back to Viago.

“I’m excited, ya.” He grins.


	2. House Tour

“Okay, so, our hero for this very special international episode is Viago.” Bobby begins, debriefing the group from the backseat of the car.

“Viago!”

“So exotic.”

“Very European”, the rest of the group comment.

“He is originally from Germany and moved to New Zealand in the early twentieth century to chase the love of his life.”

“Aww!”

“Wait, did you say twentieth century?” Jonathan asks.

“Jonathan, we’ve told you about this!” “We’ve discussed this!” Bobby and Antoni respond in unison.

“I thought you meant, like, his family!”

“No, it was him. He’s 383 years old.” 

“Oh my god!”

“You’ve gotta keep up.” Karamo says.

“Anyway, he now lives in Wellington, with his four flatmates, Vladislav, Deacon, Nick and Petyr.”

“Wow, full house.”

“Viago and his flatmates are vampires, and do drink a diet of only human blood. Did you get that Jonathan?”

“Yes, I got that part!”

“But, for the purposes of the show, they’ve agreed to suspend all meals until after this week.”

“Phew!”

“Yeah, right!”

“And we all have our crucifixes.”

“Yep!” Each gesture to their crucifixes hanging around their necks.

“Serving you Pope realness!” Jonothan says, posing with his hands under his chin.

“He was nominated by his flatmate Nick, who says that Viago is basically the head of the household, is still stuck on his lost love, and needs a makeover to be the best he can be.”

“Let’s meet him!”

-

It’s dark by the time the car pulls up outside of the house. The group walk up the driveway with a flourish, any qualms masked by professional enthusiasm.

Viago answers the door with a timid smile and an excited “Hello!”. Although the five usually greet their heroes with hugs, this time they opt to lead only with their characteristically chaotic verbal greetings.

“Where are your friends?”

“They’re just in there-” Viago says, and the five turn to see Nick’s face peeking from behind a doorway, which they later find out leads to the sitting room.

Jonathan screams and Antoni gasps, and Nick’s face disappears momentarily before Karamo takes charge.

“Come out! Come out!” Karamo persuades the trio out of hiding.

“Hey guys.” Nick says, somewhat subdued, wide-eyed in front of so many people and so many cameras. 

“Are you Nick?” Karamo asks.

“Yeah I am, nice to meet you.”

“So you nominated Viago here.”

“I sure did.”

“And who are these gorgeous creatures?” Jonathan exclaims excitedly, interrupting Karamo’s interrogation.

“This is Vladislav and Deacon.” The two enter the reception area, nodding and waving respectively. 

The camera cuts to Jonathan in the Fab Five loft.

“Vladislav is just giving me like the most intense eyes, and that facial hair, oh my goodness. Really, like, Edward from Twilight if he was, like, mature and wore more velvet. I love it.”

The shot returns to the house.

“Can you show us around?” Bobby asks, and Viago obliges, leading Bobby around with a timid smile. Tan asks Deacon to lead him to the nearest wardrobe, Jonathan in tow, Antoni disappears with Nick to find the kitchen, and Karamo braves Vladislav’s intimidating air in search of information.

-

“So you don’t actually have your own wardrobes?” Tan asks, incredulous, sifting through the clothes strewn around one of the several empty rooms. Deacon stands in the doorway with his arms crossed.

“Not really, we just all share clothes like this.”

“How does that work for you?” Jonothan asks, spinning into the room in an 18th Century cape, embroidered cummerbund, 1990s style hot pink tracksuit pants and feathered hat.

“It’s not too bad, but we do have very different styles. I would never wear what Viago wears.”

“Yeah, I can see that. A lot of this stuff is really not up to wearing as well. I mean, look at this!” Tan holds up a tan shirt littered with various rips, blood spattered all over the collar and shoulders.

“What is that made out of, burlap?” Jonathan asks, dismayed.

“That is Vladislav’s,” Deacon says, and Tan gives him a reproachful look.

-

“Do you use this at all?” Antoni asks, as Nick helps to unpack the various storage spaces around the kitchen.

“We keep blood in here for later. And sometimes, when we have, like, human friends come over, they might want something to eat.”

“Okay, so, two very different uses then.”

“Yeah.”

“All of this stuff looks like it’s like a thousand years old.”

“Some of it probably is.”

“Really?” Antoni pauses, thrown.

“Probably.” Nick answers, and Antoni’s expression stays shocked.

-

“This wallpaper! How old is this?”

“It’s from the 40s.”

“Wow! Vintage. It’s in great condition too. Probably because of the lack of natural light.”

“Ya.”

“The decoration in here is a lot, like, there seems to just be a lot of things left around the place.”

“Well, it’s hard to pick things to put away when you’ve had everything for so long.”

“Yeah, I totally get that. But maybe, if we put aside the things you really want, I could go for a cleaner look?”

Viago pauses for a moment, hesitant, but after a moment his expression changes to contentment.

“Okay.”

“Yeah?”

“Yes, let’s do that.”

-

“How long have you known Viago?” Karamo asks, hoping some initial questioning will melt Vladislav’s icy exterior.

 

“Since I came to New Zealand. He needed some flatmates and I needed a place to live.”

“Have you enjoyed it here?”

“Oh yes. Wellington is great and living with other vampires, although sometimes irritating, is good.”

“Better than being by yourself?”

“Much better, yes. By yourself is no fun at all.” Vladislav seems loosened by Karamo’s warm manner.

“What do you think is holding Viago back?” Karamo asks.

“He is grieving Katherine.” At the mention of her name Vladislav seems to freeze up again.

“Who is Katherine?”

“He came to New Zealand for her. But she married someone else and he let her go.”

“Oh wow, she was a human?”

“Yes. He cannot move on from her, even now that she’s dead.” Karamo raises his eyebrows. Vladislav doesn’t quite meet his eyes.

“She’s dead?”

“Yes, she died three years ago. Old age.”

“That’s quite a story.”

“Yes.” Vladislav’s expression is deliberately blank.

“Is there anything else?” Karamo probes for whatever is lingering under the surface, making Vladislav retreat into himself again.

“I don’t know, you’ll have to ask Viago.”

-

The group eventually convenes in the lounge room, all holding various items from around the house.

“Why is this couch only red on parts of it?” Antoni presses his hands against the stained couch.

“Oh my god.” Jonathan exclaims, and Antoni’s expression turns worried.

“Antoni, get up off of there.” Antoni jumps as if he’s sitting on a chest of bees, and Jonathan looks to the camera, horrified.

Karamo holds Vladislav’s dragon mask in front of his face, standing still in preparation for Tan’s entry through the door, at which point he jumps into a roar. Tan shouts and skitters backwards in fright.

The shot cuts to Bobby in the Fab Five loft.

“I think we have our work cut out for us.” He presses his lips together, apprehensive.


	3. Fashion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> many thanks for your patience on this one lads... im getting top surgery in two (2) days so wish me luck! will be updating asap after that

“Are you looking forward to the week, Viago?” Tan asks as he leads Viago into a clothing store, collared shirts and polos hung up along the wall behind them. The front windows are dark, and the street is empty. It’s well past closing time.

“Oh yes. I’m interested to learn from some young, modern people.”

“Oh, I like you.”

Viago smiles eagerly, happy to make a good impression with someone so intimidatingly well put together.

“How would you describe your style?”

“Well, I like to experiment. A bit of old, a bit of new. But I really like more 17th century and 18th century-”

“Waistcoats and trousers.”

“Ya.”

“Well, I definitely don’t want to take away that classic look, but I do want to modernise it a bit just to make it a little more practical for today.”

“Okay.”

“I mean a lot of your clothes that I set aside were falling apart. Or had blood all over them.”

Viago gives a sheepish, “yes” in response to Tan’s disappointed tone.

“Okay, so I’ve put together a couple of options here, you try them on and we’ll see how you go.”

Viago makes his way to the dressing room; he gives the camera an excited smile, face peeking out from behind the curtain as he closes it.

The first outfit he emerges in is what Tan describes as a semi-formal look. Viago wears a white linen collared shirt and dark chinos, with leather lace up shoes and a knee length grey jacket that is more cape than coat.

“So, we’ve got the same elements here that you would be familiar with, we’ve just updated it for the modern day.”

“Oh yes, I love this coat.”

“Yeah? It’s great, it’s like a regular coat but it has this fabric across the shoulders that make it look like a cape.”

“Yes. Very nice.”

“Shall we look at another outfit?”

“Yes.” There’s a moment of hesitation before Viago continues.  
“Do you have anything with more colour?”

Tan smiles. “We certainly do.”

The second outfit has Viago in a bright pink Hawaiian-style shirt, neatly French-tucked into tan trousers. Viago has buttoned the shirt all the way up to the top.

“You can undo this, if you want to.” Tan explains, undoing Viago’s top shirt button and adjusting his collar.  
“A bit more casual.”

“Yes, that’s interesting. I wouldn’t think to do that.”

“Wouldn’t you?”

“No.”

“Now, we can make this even more exciting, if you’re up for that.”

“Yes, let’s do it!”  
Tan reveals a silky navy bomber jacket, embroidered with patterns across the front and back.

“Wow!”

“Do you like that?”

“I’ve never seen anything like this before!”

“Really?”

“Really!”

Viago looks in the mirror and poses, hand on one hip.

“Yes!” Tan laughs. “You’re feeling it!”

“Hello ladies.” Viago giggles at the camera.

“Okay, last one.”

The final outfit is formal; a crisp collared white shirt sits under a dark green, embroidered suede vest, topped with a simple black blazer. 

“I tried to keep it a bit simple with this look, although it’s still probably more modern that you’re used to.”

“Yes, I like this”, Viago says, running his fingers along his vest. “Nice feeling.”

“Yeah, it’s a great texture. And the jacket and pants actually have a green thread running through them, if you can see that, so they compliment each other really well.”

“Do you have a necktie?” Viago asks.

“You actually don’t have to wear one with this shirt, it’s made to be worn on its own.”

Viago raises his eyebrows. “Wow, interesting.”

“Any questions?”

“Yes.”

“Yeah?”

“Yes. Uhm.” Viago lowers his voice slightly.  
“Do you have anything with a rainbow on it?”

Tan looks surprised for half a second before smiling.  
“Of course.”


	4. Grooming

The camera pans as Viago and Jonathan walk into a glass-filled salon. 

“Have a seat, have a seat!” Jonathan urges Viago toward a chair with predictable giddiness.

“Now, I’ve heard a rumour that vampire hair doesn’t grow, is this true?”

“Yes. We’re dead.”

“Okay, good to know.” Both men face a large mirror, Jonathan’s fingers disappearing in chunks as he runs his fingers through Viago’s hair.  
“Well, let’s give this a bit of a trim, a bit of a clean up, and then I’ll give you some grooming tips. Sound good?”

Viago hesitates. 

“It’ll be a super tiny trim, I promise. The tiniest.”

“Okay.”  
“You won’t regret it, I’m a professional. It’s gonna be totes amazing.” 

Jonathan speaks from the Fab Five loft. “Looking after yourself is compulsory and Viago has been missing out. I am so ready to make this handsome, vintage vampire even more gorgeous than he already is.”

“So what are your biggest concerns about your grooming, what do you want to work on?” Jonathan asks, beginning to cut Viago’s hair, the separated strands becoming visible in the mirror before falling to the floor.

“I want to style my hair. You know, you see all of these humans in the night clubs with perfect hairstyles... even though I’m dead I still want to be fashionable.”

“Absolutely! Gotta keep up that post-mortem glamour.”

“And, sometimes vampires can get a little… dirty.” Viago glances into the camera and back, trying to skirt around the details. “And it’s hard to clean.”

“Ah, yes, well, I have some things that can help with that too.”

“Great.” He seems relieved.

“So what’s, like, the best and worst things about being a vampire?”

“Well, I like being with my friends forever. I like other vampires.”

“Aw, that is so cute!”

Viago gives a tiny smile. “Yes. People think we are big monsters but I’m just a regular guy, really.”

“Yeah, you get up in the evening and put your breeches on one leg at a time like everyone else.”

“Exactly.” Any attempt at humour by Jonathan is lost on Viago, who nods serenely.

“I still feel things, I like to go out and play music and dance.”

“Yes! You sound like so much fun.”

The shot cuts back to the Fab Five loft. “Honestly, Viago is not the stereotype I imagined. I mean, yeah, he eats people. You can’t deny that. But other than that, he’s really like a normal guy who just wants to have fun like the rest of us.” Jonathan shrugs and smiles. “And he’s so cute.”

“Who’s like, your style icon?”

Viago goes to blurt a name, but hesitates.

“Who is it? There are no wrong answers.”

“Vladislav.”

“Vladislav your roommate?”

“Yes, he’s very stylish. And confident.”

“He does have a bold look.”

“Yes.”

“Do you want to look like him, though? I kinda thought you had a bit of a different style.” Jonathan nudges Viago gently toward a different line of thinking. Viago ponders.

“Yes, you’re right. I think I do want to be different from Vladislav.” He seems troubled.

“Well that’s okay, you can admire someone without wanting to look like them.”

“That’s true.” Viago’s still frowning, but Jonathan lets him think.

-

“Are you ready?” Viago nods, but the traditional turning of the client’s chair to face the mirror is replaced by Jonathan taking out his phone, snapping a quick pic as Viago grins, and showing him the result.

“Oh yes, I like that.”  
It’s just a slightly shorter version of his previous haircut, but it’s definitely neater.

“You do?”  
“Ya.”  
“You’re so handsome.”  
“Thank you.”


	5. Culture

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note the added tags!

Karamo and Viago sit side by side at a booth, seemingly alone. A sign above the abandoned bar behind them reads ‘Big Kumara’. Karamo sips a clear, fizzy drink. Viago has no drink, his hands resting on the edge of the table.

“So, Vladislav mentioned a name to me. Katherine.”

Viago’s face falls, and he looks to his hands, picking at the wood with no real purpose. 

“Does that bring up a lot for you?”

Viago nods. “Yes. She meant a lot to me.”

“Could you tell me more about that?”

“Well, I came to this country for love. I was in love with Katherine, and her family immigrated to New Zealand. I followed, but I was too late. She was married.”

“Oh wow. So you didn’t see her, didn’t speak to her after that?”

“No. I wanted her to be happy.”

Karamo nods. “Where is she now?”

“She passed away, three years ago.”

“Oh, I’m sorry to hear that.”

“Yes.”

“Do you feel like you were able to grieve Katherine properly? After being so separate from her, so suddenly?”

Viago is quiet for a moment.

“Perhaps I did not… I couldn’t go to her funeral because it was during the daytime.” He pauses again, and Karamo leaves the silence for Viago to fill.

“I think maybe I have not moved forward enough because I couldn’t see her. Not properly.”

Karamo nods, and waits a moment before speaking again.

“Well, if you’re up for it, how about tomorrow night we visit Katherine’s gravestone. And you can say goodbye. The proper way.”

Viago takes a deep breath.

“I would like that.”

-

The cemetery is sparsely lit by ornate streetlights, but most of the light is coming from large lamps and torches held by the crew. Viago stops at the end of Katherine’s plot, Karamo following.

“Take as much time as you need.” Karamo says, before walking off frame. The following shot is taken several metres away from where Viago kneels at Katherine’s tombstone. His lips are moving, as if he is talking to her.

The shot changes to Karamo in the Fab Five loft.

“This is probably a little more morbid than we usually go on this show. But if Viago can process his grief, maybe he can let go of whatever guilt or sadness that is keeping him from being happy.”

Viago stands and Karamo joins him.

“How do you feel?”

“Better.” Viago says, smiling gently.

“Much better.”


	6. Food & Wine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you're easily grossed out by blood then maybe give this one a miss

“So, I know if may seem a little weird to be teaching vampires to cook.” Antoni sits in the Fab Five loft. His dialogue is intercut with slow-motion shots of him cutting up a lime and tossing what looks like calamari in a pan.

“But there is actually some things you can do within a diet of exclusively human blood.” He speaks plainly, almost comically matter-of-fact.

The shot cuts to Antoni and Viago in an industrial kitchen, with a small portion of the vast space set up for the two.

“Okay, so, I’m gonna teach you how to make blood sausages.”

“Oh, yummy.” Viago smiles at the camera.

“Since it’s just blood and a small amount of animal product it should be just fine for you to eat.”

“Great.”

“So, I’ve got some blood here.” Antoni pulls out a clear bag of blood from the refrigerator, placing it on the metal bench.

“We borrowed this from the hospital, don’t worry.” Viago laughs nervously, looking at the camera again.

“Usually, there are many ingredients that go into a blood sausage, like onions, meat, etcetera. In this case, we want the sausages to be almost completely blood. So, what we’re gonna do is,” Antoni continues as he pours the bag of blood into a bowl.

“-We’re gonna put the blood in a bowl, and we’re gonna add some platelets. This is the stuff that makes your blood, like, go solid when you bleed. So when we add this in…” Antoni pours a clear liquid into the bowl with the blood, and stirs with a metal spoon. 

“…It should solidify much faster than if we waited for the normal amount of platelets to do their job.”

“Wow.” Viago looks at the thickening mixture, engrossed.

“So now that it’s the right texture, we can feed it into the casings.”

Once in the casings the blood looks just like a regular sausage, albeit an angry crimson.

“When you cook it, poach it gently first, then put it in a pan.” A couple of shots cover these steps.

“And we’re done. A vampire friendly blood sausage.” Antoni presents Viago and the camera with what looks like regular blood sausage, but with no onion bits. Conspicuously, neither Viago nor Antoni taste the sausage, although for different reasons.


	7. Design

Karamo and Viago sit in what appears to be a brand new four-wheel drive as Karamo drives with one hand on the wheel through the streets of Wellington.

“We’re on our way, the big reveal!” Viago’s buzzing with excitement and anxiety, and he responds to Karamo with an uneasy smile.

“Are you excited?”

“I feel like I may be sick.” Viago says, but he’s nodding, so Karamo takes that as a positive. 

“Okay!” 

As they pull up to the house, enveloped in darkness only broken by the light coming from within, the other Fab Five members rush out to greet them.

“You look so handsome!”

“Thank you.” Viago’s eyes are wide as the Five usher him toward the house.

“I can’t wait for you to see your new place.” Bobby gives Viago a warm smile, but Viago still looks terrified. As he crosses the threshold he lets out a full-blown gasp, his eyes widening as he takes in his new surroundings.

The old wallpaper has been replaced with a light-coloured paint, with the wood panelling still wrapping around the bottom of the walls. Previous decorations, such as a deer head, are still there, though they seem to have been restored. The new banister is ornate to match the wall panelling, with a wooden snake seeming to slither up the first post. 

The glass in the windows have been discreetly replaced with opaque backing, painted with murals or hidden by new drapes and curtains. The room makes up for the lack of natural light by being tastefully lit by lights tucked into corners and nooks, new lamps and fittings leaving little shadows when at full brightness.   
There’s all new carpets and rugs draped over floorboards revealed to have been properly varnished when bare. Deacon’s closet finally has proper storage. Nick finally has a lava lamp. Viago has a new alarm clock. And it’s fancy.

As they lead Viago through the house, he is astonished. By the time they reach the kitchen, equipped with new areas to store blood and human food safely and separately, he looks as if he may cry.

“I didn’t know what I expected you to do. But this is amazing.” He says, and the others “aw” at his expense.

“There’s no dust!” He says, wiping his fingers along the kitchen bench.

“This was filthy! And now it’s so… shiny. I love it.” He approaches Bobby, who looks apprehensive, and embraces him. Bobby takes a second before hugging him back.

“You’re welcome, Viago. I’m happy to help.” He says, and Viago releases him, dabbing at his eyes with his sleeve.

“I wonder what the others will say.”

When they do arrive, his flatmates are just as floored by the transformation as Viago. Nick is using their new Playstation before he’s seen the whole house, and Deacon is highly impressed with the diligent display of his record collection. Vladislav is less convinced, at first. 

“It’s very bright in here.” He grumbles, his first comment since Viago steered him around the house, giddy. Viago grins.

“Don’t you worry Vladislav! I knew you would say that! The lights are fitted with dimmers!” He waltzes to the nearest switch, lowering the light in the room to dim, faces hardly visible, before returning the levels as before. 

“You can change it!” Viago is positively beaming, and Vladislav seems to soften, nodding as if to concede.

“It is pretty cool.” 

“Of course it is. It’s wonderful.” The camera seems to stagnate for a moment as Viago and Vladislav’s gaze lingers a little too long. Vladislav goes to speak, seeming to stop and stammer once glancing toward the camera.

“Did you see the snake on the staircase?” He asks, and Viago nods. “That was my idea.”

“It’s great.” Viago says, and Vladislav seems smug, glancing toward the camera once more before leaving the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we're almost to the end lads.....


	8. Conclusion

“Okay, places everyone!” Jonathan ushers the others toward the couch, cocktail in hand. The Fab Five loft is spotless as usual, the ingredients for cocktails set out on the counter.

“I cannot wait to see how this went.” Tan says, and the five are finally seated.

The screen they all face fades from black to Viago in his new walk-in closet, flicking through his meticulously hung clothes. He picks out a few options, holding them up to himself in the mirror, clearly struggling with his decision.

“Pick something, baby!” Jonathan exclaims, and Tan responds.

“He shouldn’t be so nervous, he’s gonna look great, I gave him some fool-proof options.”

Finally, Viago picks out a silky collared shirt, covered in vertical rainbow stripes.

“A bold look.” Antoni remarks.

“What is he gonna pair that with?” Tan asks apprehensively. 

He pulls on some dark chinos. 

“Okay, good choice.”

And leather shoes.

“Also good.”

And the cape-coat.

“Alright. Alright.”

But then he hesitates. Dropping the cape-coat, he picks up a black bomber jacket, zipping it to the top.

“That’s nice!”

And then puts the cape-coat on top.

“You know, old men always have to have a few extra layers.” Karamo remarks, and Tan laughs.

“You’re right!”

A montage of the Unholy Masquerade shows Viago dancing, smiling and laughing. He discards his coat almost straight away, and later the bomber jacket too, the most vibrant vampire in a sea of gothic black.

“He’s grown so much.” Jonathan says, clutching his chest, and Bobby pats him on the shoulder.

The screen fades to black, and the Five sigh and smile at the conclusion of another transformation. But the black doesn’t last for long. The music swells and the screen lights up again.

‘Following the Unholy Masquerade, Viago felt comfortable enough to make an announcement he held off for a long time…’ the screen reads, and there is a chorus of squeals.

“What?!” Jonathan’s hand, previously clutching his own chest, is flung outwards, ending up on Bobby’s chest. They all sit up, on the edge of their seats as the text fades away and returns. 

‘He’s come out to his roommates and is proud of his identity.’

“Yas!” 

“I’m so proud!” 

“Oh my god!” 

Tan’s drink spills on the floor as they all celebrate, but he’s still grinning.

‘And that wasn’t the only thing he confessed…’

“The suspense is killing me.” 

“I think I’m having a heart attack right now.”

‘Viago and Vladislav are now in a relationship, one they say should have started long ago.’

There’s more screaming as the screen shows a photo of Viago and Vladislav holding hands, huge grins on both of their faces. Viago wears a rainbow flag pin on his blouse.

“This just goes to show, it’s never too late to teach an old dog to love himself!”

“Amen!”


	9. Behind the Scene

“Hi.” Viago greets Vladislav cheerfully from the couch as he enters the living room. Vladislav almost flinches, giving him a dismissive, “hello”, before walking stiffly to the sofa and sitting as far away from Viago as possible. 

Vladislav had been cold and distant for a while now, but especially since the Masquerade. He and Vladislav have been friends for centuries. That’s all he always thought they would be. But some twenty-first century Americans have shown him that maybe, just maybe, that’s not set in stone. But now, with this animosity, Viago was beginning to think that maybe even their friendship was in jeopardy.

“What’s the matter?” Viago asks, placing the book he was reading down beside him. Vladislav glances toward him, not making eye contact.

“Nothing.”

“Something is wrong, you hardly speak to me these days.” 

Vladislav doesn’t reply.

“Was it the changes? I mean, it was Nick’s idea and I thought it would be good, but if you don’t like it-”

“It’s not that.”

“Oh.” Vladislav still won’t meet Viago’s eye, picking at the arm of the couch. Viago takes a deep breath, keeping the words of the Fab Five in his mind as he starts to speak.

“You know, when Katherine passed I said I would never love again.”

Vladislav finally looks up, but this time it’s Viago who’s looking to the floor.

“But I think that was a lie.”

“What are you saying?” Vladislav asks, and they finally look to each other.

“I think… I love… you.”

There’s a moment of silence as Vladislav attempts to process Viago’s confession.

“What?” Vladislav exclaims, far too loud, and Viago’s terrified that he’s ruined everything.

“But- I love you!” Vladislav says, at regular volume this time, still incredulous.

“Really?”

“Yes!”

When Nick enters the living room he comes upon his two roommates, sobbing into each others arms, muttering “I love you” to each other back and forth.

“Uh… bad time?” The sobbing and muttering stops. Vladislav’s glare is a sharp as it’s ever been.

“Yes. Bad time.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and that's all folks! thanks so much for reading and commenting, this was my first fic i've ever done chapter by chapter and i think it went alright. i had a lot of fun and i hope you did too! :D


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